December 5th, 2005 01:43 pm: [custom friends groups post] save me from a rainy day, I don’t want it. yeap, rainy day to set the pace. woke up fairly early today and in a pretty decent mood. hung out with my roommate. cleaned/swept a bit. I have a feeling it’s going to be a pretty lowsy day, though. maybe more so for him, considering he is now currently unemployed. I wonder what’s in store for me? I have to have a “talk” with my boss today. it probably has to do with my “relations” with the employees. pffft. whatever, dudes. too much gossip and drama these days. that’s one thing that has always been a pet peeve of mine. oh well, we’ll see how it goes. I just hope I don’t lose my job. I can’t afford to pay my bills if I have to start over somewhere else. gah. I think I’m going to make another pot of coffee.
Current Mood: confused 😕 Current Music: kevin cey - klora Custom Friends Groups: friends - other
01:21 pm: [custom friends groups post] a flagrant miscarriage of justice I dunno why I’m being so open lately, I guess I dunno what to do. seems like I’m fucking up relations left and right and I’m not even trying. I’ve been given a lot of responsibility and almost no freetime. seems like I could handle everything going on right now. who knows, maybe it’s just this time of year. all of my relations seem bad, minus my girlfriend.
my roommate got fired today. which sucks, because he’s the other manager at my job. there was no real reason for his firing other than my boss doesn’t like him. I saw nothing wrong with the guy or his work. granted he was a little sloppy with doing things but the job still got done and shit still works.
this makes me nervous for 2 reasons: the first being, he has to pay his half of the bills. but, I’m pretty confident he’ll land back on his feet soon. it’s just nerve racking.
the second being: I have to have my “talk” with the prick that fired him today. I have no idea what’s going to happen. who the fuck knows what he’s created in his head to talk to me about. he may even fire me. god I hope not. I have a lot of bills to pay, and it’s incredibly hard for me to find jobs. my roommate is better with people and has better luck with that shit. I guess I’m too technical.
the other part to all this is it seems like my friends have all turned their backs on me. ever since I started dating this girl. my relations went to hell. some of it being my own fault, the other, who the fuck knows. maybe my luck has finally run out. we’ll see.
it’s weird though, if all of this had happened to me maybe 2 years ago, I’d be flipping the fuck out having anxiety attacks left and right. I think I’ve finally learned how to keep it together without being too self-destructive. I dunno what to do or how I should feel. I think I stopped feeling as much as I used to. I think this year has killed off a lot of feelings with everything I’ve been through. blah blah blah. time to make some more coffee.
Custom Friends Groups: friends² Current Music: c17h19no3 - a spell for breaking an opening into the sky Current Mood: confused 😕